Communicating with a Stressed-Out Family

Communicating with a Stressed-Out Family

 

Calming and assisting a stressed-out family in a medical situation is tough.  Different personalities come into play.  While some in the family may act rational and calm, others may demand answers or behave arrogantly.

 

Remember these tips to manage a group of people:

 

• Try to set a realistic tone.  While you want to immediately share positive information, you must carve out the true picture.  For example state:  “I believe your family member will do fine during the surgery, but I have to admit that his heart issues are beyond my realm of expertise.”  Never feel compelled to skip stating important facts—just to please family members.

 

• Remind them that their presence is medicine.  Always thank them for being there.  Bur remember:  family members in crisis can tend to “act up” as a show of support in case the patient dies.  For instance, if a family member hasn’t stayed connected to the family until now, he may demand answers and try to demonstrate involvement—carving out a memory in others’ minds that he or she really went to bat for the patient.  

 

Don’t get caught up in trying to over explain what’s going on.  And, don’t get caught up in

the family drama.  It’s not your job to fix past family history or rudeness.  Physically

remove yourself, if tension escalates.

 

• Offer to help them find answers.  Whether it’s a question concerning the patient or where to stay overnight near the hospital, enlist your co-workers or hospital social workers to help gain information.  When people cannot find appropriate information, they feel devalued.   

 

• Ask a few personal questions to bring comfort.  You might ask their names or ask them how the ordeal is affecting them.  Families in a crisis situation can feel their needs disappear as the patient takes center state.  Asking, “Can I get you something to drink?” or “Are you doing okay?” helps bring a small form of comfort.